Feet & Potatoes

Oi oi oi, what’s going on here. Why all the silence. Like a damn ghost town on a go-slow!

Or I am just working damn hard and can’t be hassled with things like personal thoughts. …Ha!

Ha ha ha…. No.

Actually, I have been putting in some work hours. Reading about the delightful topics of murder and rape of women in Australia. Can’t say that it really leaves one with much to say by posting hour.

I had an amusing moment with some SA ex-pats about this the other. Forced to partake in an evening with them.

I mentioned that this was my latest job. Reading crimes against women in Australia. And I have never seen such denial pour out of every last orifice in such a quick turn-around time.

“What? What crime? No no no. I am sure you don’t have much to read!”

“Well, ha, imagine you were doing the same study in South Africa! You’d still be reading the first week’s incidents!”

Ohdearyme. I didn’t even understand why the comparison came about. There I was just munching into my homemade (in that way I bought it from a store, put it into a bowl, and tried to pull off that I had made it out of a moment of generosity & domesticity! I bleach, I cook, I damn well know where the cheap deli section is in this town!) potato salad & making small talk when the next thing we were getting into a diplomatic “situation”.

Sadly, dear Denialists, even Utopia has terrible things happen. Wherever Utopia is. As long as there are living breathing creatures, bad & sad things will happen. You cannot run far enough from that reality. I am sure even the Martian amoeba must cope with crimes of sorts. Whatever an amoeba crime might be…

So I diverted and said something “better” like “Hey, did you read that global report that says Australian houses are the most expensive at the moment for the least quality!”.

Well that went down like a ton of bad-quality bricks! Probably because we were sitting in a recently purchased house….

So other than continuing to ostracise myself from my old "we're-not-from-that-country"men (luckily my Aussie mates all support me in all my foot-in-potato-salad-mouth remarks), reading myself into a nervous wreck, I am doing quite well.

I am doing this strange new activity that some apparently call “running”. I like to call it “walk for two minutes, move really fast for one minute without spraining anything, resume pleasant walking for two minutes… repeat”…. So far… the beer gut is staging a sit-in in protest of this new activity.

I know they knew that I didn’t make that salad.