tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post2400387280078597061..comments2024-03-12T09:47:58.376+02:00Comments on ChampagneHeathen: Yang the Yin of SadnessChampagne Heathenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09540128789208726965noreply@blogger.comBlogger30125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-23818471322170693842007-04-25T22:53:00.000+02:002007-04-25T22:53:00.000+02:00Typo Police:change - chanceTypo Police:<BR/><BR/>change - chanceMr Memetichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01646425850270386011noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-26696926907391070072007-04-25T22:52:00.000+02:002007-04-25T22:52:00.000+02:00Eh, that's okay, Champagny. Comments are always in...Eh, that's okay, Champagny. <BR/><BR/>Comments are always interesting, but I'll take the kudos, too. <BR/><BR/>Or is that kudos'? Kudoes? <BR/><BR/>Argh.<BR/><BR/>It doesn't matter. The point is: your blog entry gave me a change to order my thoughts on what is an interesting (and sometimes painful) subject, and that is much appreciated - in itself. <BR/><BR/>Hurray!Mr Memetichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01646425850270386011noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-64251321598296059622007-04-25T12:16:00.000+02:002007-04-25T12:16:00.000+02:00Anton - it has taken me forever to reply to this, ...Anton - it has taken me forever to reply to this, but I do love your comment here. No ability to properly think today, so no decent response to it.Champagne Heathenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09540128789208726965noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-41189352737590705102007-04-12T22:36:00.000+02:002007-04-12T22:36:00.000+02:00No, Champagne Heathen, you do not know me. However...No, Champagne Heathen, you do not know me. However, I do personally know two people who know you and have their own blogs... Dazz and Pink, the latter who I work with in some new media related place.<BR/><BR/>As for my thoughts on your question...<BR/><BR/>Well, I do think it's important to get involved with someone else in a romantic and sexual relationship.<BR/><BR/>In fact, generally speaking, while hardly a religious person (at all), I feel sex only really gets put into context in a monogamous relationship. The other stuff, the, er, base 1, base 2, etc, is fun and different, but I think sex is another story...<BR/><BR/>Anyway. I don't buy into the "it's better to love and lost, than to have never loved at all" thang. <BR/><BR/>I suspect it was some originally poetic term that changed linguistically through time into Marty McFly (no, not really, just kidding). Changed into a simple and useless cliche that loved ones, family and friends, fall on when someone they care about has just had their heart crushed. Even though they may have gone through it, they aren't anymore and their sympathy is just that...sympaphy. Not empathy. Not anymore. It's like a cliche that I think still has some worth: Misery loves company. The company of others who are trying to thread their broken hearts back together. <BR/><BR/>Don't get me wrong: I haven't been in a relationship in a long time, and the last I'm now good friends with. I just remember vividly the emotions I experienced. Except now they are a part of my experience, and not a part of my suffering. <BR/><BR/>Which leads me back to your question. The reason I think it's important to fall in love with someone falling in love with you is, quite simply, so experience pain. And suffering. And the human condition. It may not make you a better person, but it <I>might</I>.<BR/><BR/>And that's why it's worth it. <BR/><BR/>- AMr Memetichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01646425850270386011noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-28577050893666841832007-04-05T12:22:00.000+02:002007-04-05T12:22:00.000+02:00Anton - welcome! Thanks for all the comments! Do I...Anton - welcome! Thanks for all the comments! Do I know you? <BR/><BR/>I like your term "Spiritual Siamise Twins". As well as what you say about relationships - what do you FEEL about it, do you feel they are worth it? Most people would answer yes. "Better to have loved and lost"...and all of that. <BR/><BR/>This post was not inspired by a bout of sadness caused by the end of a relationship. But that is for another post sometime in the far future. But it is fascinating to see how much public grieving people are allowed following the end of a relationship, and the reality of how much silent grieving they end up enduring.Champagne Heathenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09540128789208726965noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-46527987792651703472007-04-05T03:26:00.000+02:002007-04-05T03:26:00.000+02:00I don't know the whole "you got two days to get ov...I don't know the whole "you got two days to get over your grief" thing. I know I feel sad as often as I feel happy, but it's normally stable. <BR/><BR/>That gets thrown out the window if it involves a relationship gone apocalyptic,though. I remember thinking, in my last relationship, when it ended, "Great, here we go again..." It took me 6 months to get over her. It's really not easy and I sometimes doubt it's worth it.<BR/><BR/>Isn't easier on your own? I mean, friends are one thing, but relationships are like...Spiritual Siamise Twins...and the surgery required to separate you is one real mean bitch. <BR/><BR/>I don't know. I just feel balance is essential ina relationship, but balance is almost impossible to actually get. It's always a power struggle, and it sucks. <BR/><BR/>I hate to admit it, but I agree with the lyrics to the Green Day song...<BR/><BR/>"I walk a lonely road, the only one that I have ever known..."Mr Memetichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01646425850270386011noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-63789310790846886612007-04-02T10:35:00.000+02:002007-04-02T10:35:00.000+02:00Thanks High! And yes, right now I think I am deali...Thanks High! And yes, right now I think I am dealing with the other forms it can manifest itself in. But now it is time to face it. Fcking scary but oh so necessary.Champagne Heathenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09540128789208726965noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-85578830941032787332007-04-01T09:27:00.000+02:002007-04-01T09:27:00.000+02:00Champers,A bit slow on the uptake given the differ...Champers,<BR/><BR/>A bit slow on the uptake given the different weekends here. <BR/><BR/>I agree whole heartedly with your post. I come from a family where we used to believe that it was so good that whatever happened we'd quickly get up and move on and power through... <BR/><BR/>Having grown up a bit outside of the family mindset, it is so obvious that if you do not properly deal with the sadness or what causes it; it manifests in the different ways! Often that is harder to change than truly acknowledging what you are going through in the present!<BR/><BR/>Take your time...High in Dubaihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15246544611963211719noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-17834788910857682552007-03-30T17:07:00.000+02:002007-03-30T17:07:00.000+02:00Smoooches with the occasional flash to you Mr Onio...Smoooches with the occasional flash to you Mr Onion!<BR/><BR/>Thegodowner - how did I know that would spark your attention!Champagne Heathenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09540128789208726965noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-80649938889416570012007-03-30T16:31:00.000+02:002007-03-30T16:31:00.000+02:00sucking drugged up candy coated unicorns.golly.sucking drugged up candy coated unicorns.<BR/>golly.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-40142502195927589132007-03-30T16:26:00.000+02:002007-03-30T16:26:00.000+02:00Ah Ms Heathen. We love you. And we hate that you a...Ah Ms Heathen. We love you. And we hate that you are sad. <BR/>More wine! More boys! No brakes!<BR/><BR/>ZONKS!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-1760192736780338572007-03-30T16:20:00.000+02:002007-03-30T16:20:00.000+02:00HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAH!! That's Karma smacking you over ...HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAH!! That's Karma smacking you over the spirtual head. <BR/><BR/>Are you talking about taking drugs? Or sucking on the candy of some real unicorn? oh.my.god. ....maybe I should delete what I just typed.Champagne Heathenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09540128789208726965noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-66789460113723806492007-03-30T16:15:00.001+02:002007-03-30T16:15:00.001+02:00DOH! Dang typo ruined the effectDOH! Dang typo ruined the effectAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-85208876832895286312007-03-30T16:15:00.000+02:002007-03-30T16:15:00.000+02:00Candy-coated unicorns are quite hard to findCandy-coated unicorns are quite hard to findAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-45580013502479974022007-03-30T16:14:00.000+02:002007-03-30T16:14:00.000+02:00Candy-coated unicorns are quite gard to findCandy-coated unicorns are quite gard to findAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-83233554567514402912007-03-30T16:07:00.000+02:002007-03-30T16:07:00.000+02:00Argh. You mean the whole reason we could not get p...Argh. You mean the whole reason we could not get pssed was cause I was on antibiotics?!! Oh please, I have been drinking on antibiotics since I was in the womb.Champagne Heathenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09540128789208726965noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-19515189649034769102007-03-30T15:59:00.000+02:002007-03-30T15:59:00.000+02:00I do? Says who!?AND the reason I didn't let you dr...I do? Says who!?<BR/><BR/>AND the reason I didn't let you drink wine is cos the loony people put you on medication. It mixes well. Too well.<BR/><BR/>SHA-ZAM!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-53691449674328711382007-03-30T15:49:00.000+02:002007-03-30T15:49:00.000+02:00Peas - only a pleasure. And helps to know writing ...Peas - only a pleasure. And helps to know writing this up helps other people. <BR/><BR/>Onion Dude - Schnookums, you are the 1 who has to deal with a huge amount of the resulting grief, so I would've thought you would be begging me to just SIT STILL. <BR/><BR/>ACTUALLY, SAYS YOU!! You would not let me have even one single sweet drop of wine the other day. Just dumb tea. Grrr. <BR/><BR/>I'll KAPOW you.Champagne Heathenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09540128789208726965noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-37885003377429830632007-03-30T15:44:00.000+02:002007-03-30T15:44:00.000+02:00Nononononono! More wine! More boys! No brakes!KAPO...Nononononono! More wine! More boys! No brakes!<BR/><BR/>KAPOW!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-24699042548312159902007-03-30T15:11:00.000+02:002007-03-30T15:11:00.000+02:00Thanks for this post Champs - it cheered me up, kn...Thanks for this post Champs - it cheered me up, knowing that someone feels the same way about sadness as I do.<BR/>xxPeas on Toasthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03349482085062035903noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-2810632571435149792007-03-30T12:59:00.000+02:002007-03-30T12:59:00.000+02:00Robs - thanks for that. Such a gorgeous comment. A...Robs - thanks for that. Such a gorgeous comment. And you know me, I want to experience this life in everyway (Well, maybe not extreme sports) and get to know it as well as possible. That's why I am learning to not run from this, but rather come to learn & love it to. <BR/><BR/>Rev - Thank you. I think it is the fear of depression that has had me avoiding. But avoiding won't keep you away from experiencing what you are ultimately meant to. And it is depression that might force one to finally face reality. <BR/><BR/>Ole!<BR/><BR/>Dolce!!! Are you around for good? Or just passing through? That's it, that the shit heals faster if you deal with it when you first meet it, rather than pushing it away or dealing with it only in small superficial chunks. <BR/><BR/>I think I avoided taking a good hard look at the various instance of pain I have felt over the many years, and now I have more to heal in one stint, so making the stint that much longer, that much more exhausting. Bugger it, but ah well, bluddy life!<BR/><BR/>Stick around us for awhile, ok!Champagne Heathenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09540128789208726965noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-37394337604976984402007-03-30T12:41:00.000+02:002007-03-30T12:41:00.000+02:00Hey Champers...long time...and good move...sometim...Hey Champers...long time...and good move...sometimes, taking a good hard look (even when it hurts like hell) helps the shit to heal faster.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-77784689081827587432007-03-30T12:24:00.000+02:002007-03-30T12:24:00.000+02:00Feel sad, work your way through it, hopefully make...Feel sad, work your way through it, hopefully make some life choices along the way.<BR/>But don't let the malaise set in 'cause at some point this sadness may turn to depression and I don't think you want that.<BR/><BR/>Tequila, Mexico's favourite anti-depressant!!Revolving Credithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15574797355925391736noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-40578476668314661752007-03-30T11:12:00.000+02:002007-03-30T11:12:00.000+02:00Fuzzles - Exactly. As HPF says, it makes the whole...Fuzzles - Exactly. As HPF says, it makes the whole human experience more full.Champagne Heathenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09540128789208726965noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28321828.post-32636742227138913602007-03-30T10:59:00.000+02:002007-03-30T10:59:00.000+02:00Rob - I think right now I am learning how to 'indu...Rob - I think right now I am learning how to 'indulge' in it. And yes, it is out of fear of "dwelling on it" that means I have never really allowed it before...Just Buck Up Kid & Smile & Move On...and all of that. <BR/><BR/>Phlips - it is my darling good friends who have always been pushing for me to stop, realise, and sit in it. I have been the one finding all means to avoid it. <BR/><BR/>But is "dwelling" not exactly as you describe - realising, thinking thro, understanding, moving fwd. Wallowing in it to the point of it becoming all you know & feel is what not to allow. <BR/><BR/>Biz!<BR/><BR/>Kevin - but this is what I am arguing against now. That we pull in (embrace & focus on) happy times, and push away (impatiently wait for it to pass/ don't dwell on) the sad ones. That this is not ultimately healthy. We need to accord sadness as much attention as happiness, and not run from it. Otherwise it will build up silently & bite us for attention later. <BR/><BR/>HPF - Aaah, I knew you would get it. You are a few steps ahead of me in this game!<BR/><BR/>Exactly, it develops the fullness of experience. And feelings just 'are', no matter how much we like or hate that. <BR/><BR/>I'll take note of your P.S.<BR/><BR/>Nickita - Thanks for a gorgeous comment. Smoooooches.Champagne Heathenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09540128789208726965noreply@blogger.com