“So have you shtuped Champers yet?”
Great. Greeeeaaaaaat. Thanks friend, you’re really helping this awkward situation.
The husband was failing to control his alcoholic queen. Their little “chat” on the way to the photo exhibition about being polite just this once had flown over the mate’s head:
“Oh, I thought that Darling D was just meant to be the polite one!”
“No – you as well – could we try not to freak him out immediately. Could we not throw him in the deep end just yet!”
“Talking about Ends being Deep….”
“AAAKKKK! NO!!! POLITE!”
I was all coy at first. The epitome of a good girl. Clean mouth, clean thoughts, clean living. It didn’t last. I blame the group coercion for me to stop detox a day early. Snormossels. Predator. Which straight man had the most gay shaggable ability. The photo of the chick with the hairy legs. The Yeti of my past & when Hubby once had to ask if I was going be having puppies. They all came out in conversation.
And he took it all in his stride. Chuckling to himself. He even didn’t get the predator analogy. And that’s cause he thinks the female form is damn beautiful.
Did you hear that, hubby!! We are even more attractive when butt-nekid! HA! HA HA HA hahahhaahaha! Straight men do not think that a naked woman looks like she could take out a small town of bald children with her bits! But rather, that she is b.e.a.u.t.i.f.u.l!
Hubby is now discussing divorce. But I am not ready for that. I might willing to usurp a twenty-six year stint of fierce independence. But as soon as I even consider the idea of forsaking my best mates for a man causes me to convulse and fear.
Well, until he whispers in my ear of where he would like me to be in a bit… Darling D, my most wonderful husband, I love you, I can never stop loving you, but….Home Time!
P.S. And the 'THIS IS SA' MOMENT OF THE WEEK goes to:
“We hear of many rapes, because people don’t have access to them [women]”.
ANC member of parliament George Lekgetho
Jeremy of Trash Media has the whole scoop, of how this MP tries to justify his thinking on women, sex, prostitution, the legalisation thereof, and rape - in picture & text.