Tuesday, September 19, 2006


I’m hungry. Where are the free tea and muffins?? It is already time for a tea break.
I spend one day at an office bonding conference/ “Say 3 nice things about your colleague and then hug”… “Uh, you’re very international”. (I kid you not, that was 1 of my 3 things I said. I got told I was approachable). And otherwise all you do is eat heavy meals or snacks…or doodle on your free writing pad with your free pen. Now I’m back at the office and too full to work. Bleugh.
As for the weekend… Thank god for the ‘conference’. It also allows one to catch up on extreme lacking sleep.

This weekend it was established:
- I am the best air guitarist around;
- 30-somethings at a smart house warming, and who are married, find it very difficult to engage in conversation with drunk 25-somethings who have been air-guitaring all afternoon at a concert;
- I have a problem & it is called 1 litre sangria from Catz @ 4am on Sunday mornings;
- No one else has this problem. They just have a problem with staying awake while I partake in 4am 1 litre sangria;
- I might be shy and reserved at this moment in my life, but I still am able to make friends simply by quietly sitting on kitchen counters at parties;
- AND these new friends will ensure that I am fed mini hotdogs they surreptitiously cook, as well as whiskey, tequila, fancy ham & French cheese scavenged from locked fridges and cupboards;
- Karma is still on my side… I was 3 cars away from being towed when we got back it after the concert;
- There is a digs of guys in this town that have had conversations about sleeping with me, and they all would, even though I do not know 1 of them, and have known the rest for years but none of them have ever hit on me…to my misled knowledge apparently;
- Steers works as breakfast too, even when cold and stored in your cubbyhole for most of the previous night;
- Knees are fickle things that cannot handle hours of hooligan dancing. My left knee still hurts when I twist it in certain ways;
- Winona Ryder wore terrible outfits in REALITY BITES & I think we will all soon be embarrassed that we were part of the grunge generation;
- Half of 14 000 of Jo’burg residents think I am an amusing hooligan, especially that old coloured man who wouldn’t sing when I held the “microphone” out to him and my friend waltz’d with his wife;
- Oysters, prawns, white wine, and more sangria is an excellent way to pass an entire Sunday for a friend’s farewell;
- A hangover is not an excuse to ever miss such a lunch & all those who did are not in good books. (Luckily I woke up hangover-free…it still needed to hit);
- Jo’burg electricity was sneakily out during dawn of Sunday and I bet the ESKOM guys thought no one would notice. It was noticed;
- When you start “Cha Cha Cha’ing” it’s time to go home…but you still won’t;
- I am in sht for my UNISA assignments & copy/paste is looking more attractive by the passing procrastinated day.


P said...

"You are very international"?? Really?! LOL!

TwoFlower said...

hmmmm....i think an air-guitar competition needs to take place between the two of us because i am almost 100% certain that i am the best air-guitarist in the world!!! i even have fans!! haha!

Anonymous said...

What a weekend, sounds like you had a huge one! I love the way you can pack it all into a post, but yet at the end of it I'm still not exactly sure what the hell you were doing, lol!

Champagne Heathen said...

Hey perspective - welcome to my blog! Good to have you here.

2F - we will have to have a air-guitar-off! I know there are photos of my moves. Now to just recall who was the person/ people taking those photos.

Dave - it's an art! ...although it might be that I also was not exactly sure what the hell I was doing!

Revolving Credit said...

So, about this conference, did we have any 'Something about Champs'??

You're very approachable? So which street corner did they spot you on?

You obviously did something after slurping huge quantities of tequila, probably @ 4am on so street corner.

May explain why the whole digs, dig you even though you profess not to know any of them.

..alcohol induced amnesia...

Seems to be a lot of that going round today.

TwoFlower said...

ah, don't you hate it when someone takes a photo of you doing something silly and you have no recollection of it happening? but look on the bright side - at least you know someone took photos of you...i'm scared that someone got a photo of me during my 'boob-off' with the boys and is now patiently waiting to blackmail me at a very inconvenient time. oh, i bloody well hope not!

Champagne Heathen said...

Rev, unfortunately for you+your possible banter the conference was "hairgel" free and all above board...as in well behaved, and not anything about boardmembers!

There is only 1 guy in the digs I don't know. The rest I know well. I reckon it is rather just my gorgeous body that has them conversing on such topics, rather than my post-tequila behaviour. My post-tequila behaviour hardly lands anyone in any bed, other than me looking to snooooze.

2F -
"ah, don't you hate it when someone takes a photo of you doing something silly"....then I'd have no photos of me ever!!
Don't stress about blackmail. Unless you plan on becoming some Hollywood star and using it to your "innocent persona" advantage.